An Unofficial Guide to New Year’s Resolution by Goldman Sachs Elevators

Exercise more. Less drink. Travel. Save money.

There are trivial regurgitated New Year resolutions. And they get pretty boring, especially with regard to most of you never meet them, selecting instead revel in the cliché of his own existence and restore them again next year.


“Hey fat ass, I already know what your New Year’s resolution is.”


So stop saying that you are going to use stairs in coming year, cut back the Starbucks latte $ 6 or as far away from the park entrance, Whole Foods as you can and just follow my tips …

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1. Determine to be mum most of the time. Join Crossfit. Do The P90X. Detox in January. Become a vegan. Buy a TV. Training for a marathon. Start a Paleo diet. Go to one or all of them, but please shut the f–k up about it.


“No one would like to run a marathon if they should sign a non-disclosure agreement, for the first time.”


2. Read More. Yes, it’s that the fixed handle boring in most people, but this year, to be more concrete and real. Make a list of 10 books to read, a healthy mix of fiction and non-fiction. Throw in a few classics that you are stumped, I have never read in college. Buy hardcover copies and keep them as a small trophy for their achievement. Economist compiles a list of the great “book of the year”, but it will be those of “the private life of Chairman Mao.”


“Reading makes you borrow someone else’s brain and will make you more interesting during the dinner.”


3. Befriend a World War II veteran. Spend time with him. Talk with him like this. Because there are not too many of them again. I certainly don’t regret helps Red coated Chelsea pensioners and pensioners with Tesco bags down the King’s Road.


4. Wash your hands more often. Actual studies have shown that the average New Yorker indirectly touching penises 24 a day and twice as much if they work in 1585 Broadway.


5. Take a course, online. Why are you still voice hollowly on self-improvement, when leading universities and schools, including Duke, Wharton, and the myth of significant investments to free education. Ironically, the statistics showed, that seems to be better educated and more affluent who benefit from this. But who among us can benefit from knowing more about accounting, marketing, psychology, or real estate and contract law?


6. Watch “The Sopranos” from beginning to end. Even if you have already seen.


7. Refresh the inventory in your wardrobe. Go 2 new suits, shirts, 2 pairs of jeans, 2 pair of shoes and 50 pairs of socks. Maybe this guide will help. Why? For the same reason that Michael Jordan wore a new pair of shoes every single game.


8. Avoid extreme and unrealistic health pledges. Eat right, exercise and drink it in moderation; This is not rocket science.


 “A guy came up to me at the gym and asked me what kind of events and so hard to train. Life, motherf–ker. “


9. Drink more green tea. Add manuka honey and a bit of fresh ginger.


10. Nix the dramatic savings. Don’t go crazy with unrealistic goals for how much you want to save this year. Keep it simple; spend less than you make and save on expensive things until you can afford them. There is a need for extreme savings plan, so be sensible … but don’t forget to enjoy the expendable income.


“There is no point in funeral $ 50 million or $ 25 million on divorce.”


11. Write down your goals. Most people meet their decisions, but never the people who write them have proven a higher success rate. One step further and make a list of what you want to accomplish each day, week and month. Just save them and check them out on the old-fashioned way. And tell You There is an App for to go f–k himself.


“I’m going to open a training center that turns into a bar after January.”


12. Go get a comprehensive health checkup. Have your partner get one too.


13. Keep your phone away when its dinner time.


“Check the phone after another pulls their phone is yawning in our generation.”


14. Laugh more. This means: to socialize more, drink more, has a long brunch, throw parties, host of a drunken night games. Be spontaneous. Update your friends, if necessary.


“Most people don’t even would be the main character in a movie about his own life.”


15. Don’t only rely on the gym. I remember the feeling of playing competitive sports as a kid, when you’re on the pitch and not think about anything else. Most of us have forgotten what it feels like. So to start a band, or find someone to play tennis with.


16. Drink more. I’m not a contradiction with the previous … If you’re healthy, eating well and exercising so that your body can handle a few more drinks and then. There is nothing wrong with the occasional black, and just want to lie to your doctor anyway. “For the most part, May 15 to 17 units per week, doc.”


“The first bottle is for health, second is for love and the third for sleep.”-Eubulus, 350 BC.


17. Help pets get adopted, if for no other reason than to prove that you can. I will get it with spirit and Peony currently in the North Shore Animal League in Port Washington, New York, United States. (Tweet me; I will pay for recording fees.)


“Wasps kissing their wives on the forehead and their dog on the mouth.”


18. Get to the regular foot massage. A dark room. No TV. Not a loud voice. It is the most quiet and efficient 75 minutes I have every week. I’m going on Saturday with the Weekend ft and The Economist.


19. Stay in on New Year’s Eve. It’s amateur night and rarely lives up to your expectations in all conditions. Dressed up, strap on Patek, go out for some sort of noodles Per Se and get drunk on Krug? It sounds like my on Tuesdays. This year stay in … And then start 1 January, early and efficient.

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